Alexander has learned the first verse of the song Simple Gifts in his First Day School at Quaker Meeting. He loves to sing it, and I love to listen. Tonight at bedtime he sang while I hummed the tune. After we were done he smiled and said, "That was nice."
It was nice. But I was touched in another way as well. As we sang, I was reminded of the pain of the Amish community this week as they mourn the horrible deaths of their daughters in the latest school shooting. Quakers are sometimes confused with the Amish. Although our theology is quite different, we do share a few things in common, such as the call to simplicity and nonviolence. I looked in the face of my little son and remembered that many of the Amish boys had been forced to leave their sisters in the one room school with the killer. I wondered how this incident will affect their faith as they grow. Then we prayed for children everywhere.
I heard on NPR today that as the members of the small Amish village prepared to support the families of the victims with meals and helping hands, they were also asking about the family of the man who victimized them. They were preparing to stand by and support that family as well. The NPR guest said they had "already moved on to forgiveness". I'm not so sure about that. Such an analysis makes the Amish reaction seem somehow super-human, or at least super spiritual. The Amish are human beings like the rest of us. I'm sure they struggle with doubt, anger, grudges, and grief, just as we all do. Forgiveness may come later, at different times for different individuals. Rather than forgiveness, I suspect the Amish show of love for the family of their enemy comes out of a consistant *practice* of humility and of seeing others as God sees them. When a person or a community practices these things, they can choose to respond with love even in the face of persecution or tragedy. They can more easily see through facades of negative emotions and behavior to the broken humanity that lies beneath. It's a "Simple Gift" to see and respond to such truths. A simple gift borne of coming "down where we ought to be".
Simple, but not easy.
Portrait of the Artist as a Middle-Aged Woman
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I received my membership card from the Philadelphia Museum of Art today.
The front of it has an excerpt from a painting by Wassily Kandinsky, Circles
in ...
2 years ago
5 comments:
This was beautifully written.
I've been so emotional over this school shooting -- over all of them, but this one in particular. The forgiveness cannot be easy and it cannot possibly come quickly. But "fake it 'till you make it" seems to be in practice here and it's an amazing thing to see. Did you hear that on the request of the Amish community, there is a fund set up for the killer's widow and children?
No, Jen I hadn't heard about the fund.
That's a very generous thing for them to do. I *had* heard about how many Amish showed up at the gunman's funeral. What a statement that made.
I don't know, Stephanie--this is a hard topic for me to think about on many levels. I just can't grasp the concept of forgiveness when it comes to the taking of a life (or lives) and I have a difficult time thinking about how God might possibly fit into the equation when such tragedy happens.
Have you ever read *The Sunflower: On the Possibilities and Limits of Forgiveness* by Simon Wiesenthal? His book is about that: forgiveness and he wrestles with the question of how one can forgive the unforgiveable act (at least in Judaism) of murder. The first part of the book is his account of an incident he experienced when he was a prisoner in a concentration camp during the Holocaust, and the second part of the book consists of responses on the topic of forgiveness. It's one of my all-time favorite books.
Alissa, I haven't read that book, but I've heard of it. (Maybe I heard Wiesenthal on an NPR talk show?) I've never had someone close to me murdered, so I can't really speak from any kind of experience. I would hope I could come to some kind of forgiveness, however. (BTW, I don't see forgiveness as saying "everything's O.K. now." It's more about letting go of feelings of bitterness and hatred, and not letting the other person have that hold over you.) I'm always so inspired by the inner peace of those who can forgive. So often, that inner peace leads to some form of external peace as well, which is my hope for the world. Plus, since pretty much every major religion touts forgiveness as good for the *forgiver*, I suspect they're collectively on to something about our human psyche and how to keep it healthy. Certainly murder strains the bounds, however, and I can't judge those who find forgiveness impossible. I can only hope to find it for myself if I ever need to.
The question of why there is evil in the world and how the concept of god fits into that, is a disscussion to have over coffee or tea, not one for typing. I wish we *could* have that discussion and many others! I'm sure we would have a great time! :o)
Stephanie
Yes, it would be a good discussion--what a shame that we can't have it over a cup of tea!
Alissa
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