Meandering, part 2

Inspired by my previous post and, in turn, Aliki's post, my youngest sister has a lovely blog entry about rediscovering the ability to meander as an adult. It's worth a look -- check it out here.

Meandering

This recent post on Aliki's blog got me thinking. I'm going to quote her a bit for those who don't have time to check out the original post:

In a meeting this Monday morning at Liam's school... much off-the-topic concern was expressed over his inability to make a speedy trip from the resource room back to the classroom and vice versa. Apparently it has taken him as much as six minutes to walk the short route.

He stops to look in the recycling barrel! One teacher commented...

He reads the bulletin board!

I've caught him pulling papers out of the trash-can and reading them!

I am... perplexed... by all the clocking and accounting of movements that goes on. Liam has never been interested in the end result; it's the process that interests him--the journey, the diversions which tempt and might lead him to bigger, more interesting things.

And really, when you think about, who can blame him? The starting and ending points of a day (and of life) are far less interesting than what happens in-between. Between points A and B lie infinite possibilities--the unimagined, thousands and thousands of connecting and re-connecting lines between ideas and dreams and more ideas. The magic of it all is in what is spread out in-between, not so much in the predictability of what lies at either end.

So often, when I read accounts of the myriad ways that schools force children into molds or squash their natural curiosity, or make something potentially fun into something dreary or stressful, I respond with a mental, "Thank goodness for homeschooling". But this time I can't say that. I'm just like those teachers -- always goading the children to "Stop dawdling", "Hurry up", "Come ON!" Sometimes my behavior is justified, but honestly, often it's not.

Have I become unable to meander? Even when the kids and I take a walk at the nature center, after a certain amount of poking about, I'm encouraging them to move on, simply because *I* can't stand to stay in one spot any longer. I'm sure I used to be able to dawdle. I can remember doing it as a little girl. Actually, what I remember is daydreaming, but I must have been meandering at the same time.

Yet I haven't quite hit upon the real issue. I can still "wander". Housework is often interrupted by excursions into photo albums, books, papers, etc. (Of course, being the responsible grown up that I am, I chide myself for such lapses in efficiency.) Even on foot, I can meander -- enjoying the journey if I'm not in a hurry. So maybe my problem is with stopping while *someone else* smells the proverbial roses. Yeah, I think that's it. It's a kind of self- centeredness or control issue masquerading as normal parental behavior.

Bummer. This one's gonna take some work to overcome...

Thursday Thoughts

A baby is a gift to more than just his family.

The other day I went to the annual apple give-away sponsored by our city’s Garden Project. Participants can fill 2 paper grocery bags with free apples – a total of 35 – 40 lbs of apples! Problem was, I forgot to bring my baby sling for Ethan and he was NOT going to be content in his car seat while I filled my bags. I handed him to Brianna, but her seven-year-old arms aren’t strong enough to carry him for longer than a few minutes. When she tired, I held him while she began to pack apples... slowly! I resigned myself to the fact that this was going to take much longer than I had planned on.

My rescuer was a woman in late middle age. She turned to me with a hopeful expression and said, “I could hold him.” Hold him she did, while Brianna and I packed our two bags and I carried them to the car. “You forget how tiny they are!” she cooed. He fussed only a tiny bit to the woman’s delight and my relief. Every time I looked over to check on them, the woman looked radiant. When she handed him back to me, we thanked each other. Somehow I think I did her a bigger favor than she did me.

Alexander is diligently saving polar bears. Whenever someone leaves a light on, he admonishes us to turn it off “to save polar bears.” Somewhere, he must have heard of the connection between energy use, global warming and the melting Artic ice. It’s not only cute, it’s effective! :o)

Alexander is also learning to read. He got a unused phonics workbook handed down to him by his cousin. I thought we probably wouldn’t use it either, since Xander has thus far eschewed formal study of reading. (While at the same time wishing desperately that he *could* read!) Nevertheless, I showed it to him and left it out for him to look at if he wished to. Later, he asked me to help him with it and that was it – he was off! He did about 100 pages over two days. I went to the library and got him some very easy readers, including the wonderful Otto books by David Milgrim. He is *so* proud of himself! It’s wonderful to see.

To help him along, we've borrowed the DVD box set of The Electric Company episodes from our library. The Electric Company has to be the best reading program ever aired on TV. It's entertaining for adults too -- with a cast that includes Bill Cosby, Rita Moreno, and Morgan Freeman, how can you go wrong?

Here are a couple of more recent shots of Ethan. He’s growing and changing before our eyes! He’s going bald right now. It’s not evident yet in these photos, which were taken a couple of weeks ago, but over the past week, he’s lost most of the hair on the top of his head in a male-pattern baldness progression. I wonder if it’s a precursor to later mid-life baldness? I don’t recall it happening to Alexander. There is some male-pattern baldness in my family, so it’s possible. Luckily, baldness in babies is both cute and temporary!